Older and wiser

Ah boo. It's my last day in Edinburgh - leaving for London tonight. Can't believe that a week flew by so quickly, and that I wasted 2 days being sick in bed.

I had such an amazing time here catching up with old friends, making new friends, drinking like a Welsh Coal Miner, soaking up the wonderful Festival atmosphere and just generally misbehaving. Just what I needed!

Whenever I leave a place during my travels, I like to reflect back on what I learnt during that time. So here goes:

1. Anya was right : a taxi is the only way to travel! Ah yes, never underestimate the wisdom of 6 year olds.
2. Don't ever believe the weather man; he's a lying bastard with a really sick sense of humour. And also, don't think that sunny skies in Scotland mean that there will be no rain. There will always be rain in Scotland. It generally waits for you to come outdoors without a brolly or a raincoat, and then it sneaks up on you and pisses down on your head and soaks you to the core. Which leads me to my next point.
3. Don't bother to do your hair in rainy climates. There isn't much point in spending an hour trying to style it because you'll just end up looking like a drowned rat within minutes. Just bloody well tie it up. Don't bother with make-up either. Only use water-proof mascara.
4. The Brits stare a lot. They can't help it; it's just the way they're wired. Staring back and trying to shame them into looking away will not work. In fact, it will just encourage them.
5. The self check-out at Sainsbury's rocks!
6. It's possible to pick up an accent in a week. Though most people will think you're making fun of them, so try not to do it.
7. Everything is always better in a foreign country when you're on holiday.
8. In Scotland, "wee" means small. If you tell people you need a wee, they'll ask, "A wee what?"

Sigh. Goodbye Scotland... So long, and thanks for all the fish. Huge thanks as well to Charmz, Andrew, Anya, Pierre and Denise for making my trip so amazing. Sheepdog, love you millions - you're medicine for the soul, and it uplifts me just knowing that we share the same planet.